Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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