Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
