im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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