We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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