Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
