just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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