hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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