im drinking this country out of the recession.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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