I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
