Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
