K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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