kristin has been a bad kristin
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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