Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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