a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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