The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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