I've blown a few things in my day
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
The beers last night were like the tears from god
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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