My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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