are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
