did you get engaged???
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
