A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
