Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
