I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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