I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
