Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
