My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize