East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I DEMAND FORESKIN
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
