i don't like sucking hair
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
