It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
