you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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