I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
