I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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