Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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