Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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