if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
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