Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
