yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
