she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
