he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
