It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
