So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
