i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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