Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
