none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
