Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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