I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
