I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
