I skipped work to stalk him.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
