I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
