i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize