He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
