they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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