The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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